As a child, I thought I had it all figured out. I was smug with the little knowledge I had of the universe. I would paint, I would read, I would play, I would star-gaze and live a happy life in my very own surreal utopia. Like other regular kids, I was fascinated by the idea of flying and wanted to be a pilot, someday. Somehow, I felt, life was a lot more gratifying and a lot less complicated then. I am not sure if “the child is grown, the dream is gone” or if its still somewhere deep down waiting to find voice. I’ve never had my life fully planned out but I’ve sure thought about what I would want it to be like. Me and a few intimate friends would discuss at length a myriad topics ranging from high-school crushes to the dream job, the ideal guy to the perfect vacation spot. All said and done, destiny works in funny ways.
Strange I had to be reminded of the all this on a day I was least hoping to sit down and reminisce. Earlier this morning I was cleaning up some of my “junk”(as my mom would like to put it). But to me it is nothing less than a treasure-trove of things accumulated over the last 21 years, 3 cities, 3 schools and a college. As I dig deeper, I find hundreds of scraps and trinkets(as worthless as they maybe) treasured and kept safe for their sentimental value.Notebooks with random notes and caricatures of teachers on them, paper scraps on which we played ‘Bingo’ during those soporific classroom hours, the score sheets of 'book-cricket' and mean comments on the meaner people – they were all there. The photocopies of the topper’s notes, ‘charulatha’(aka the local author) textbooks that remind one of the slog sessions the night before exams, certificates, autograph books, friendship-bands, photos of those wonderful times together, the keepsakes, the declaration of enduring love, friendships gained and kept, pledges to stay through thick and thin, promises broken, promises kept, good times, and the bad times – all came rushing in one sudden surge of nostalgia. School identity cards of the naive school kid, the awkward teenager and the 21-er on the brink of adulthood - these little things that remind one of the younger, happier, sunnier days. The days before you realized you lived in a bubble and pragmatism got the better of you.
I read these lines somewhere.
Don't wish I'd gone another way
For all the friends who've come and gone
For all the choices, right or wrong
Black and white or shades of grey
Without them I'd not be me today" As the cliché goes, time waits for none. Gradually the strings come undone. And as we become footnotes in some peoples’ lives, we meet others.
But as they say – “The show must go on.”
